Brownies and Hedgehog's are Tasty Midnight Snacks

So while I was in the middle of working on my webcomic, reading Cracked, and learning to crochet, I decided I should go put up the brownies I'd made and grab one while I did so; well, the Hedgehog was asleep, so I thought I was being quiet for him, but when I turned around after closing the fridge door, I saw him blinking blearily at me from the bed. So I smiled and waved cheerfully, and was halfway back to the bathroom before I thought better of it and turned back to kiss him goodnight; as I neared his face, I was treated to this reaction:

This is clearly the face of someone who thinks his girlfriend is about to eat him.

You Know You Play Too Much Assassin's Creed When...

I’m a bit of a clingy person, I can’t help it, really… Abandonment issues and all. The Hedgehog normally handles it very well, especially when it means right before he leaves I follow his every single movement from about a foot away from him at farthest, following him as he puts on his shoes and coat and gets ready to leave for work.

Hi! I was just following you from three inches away as you moved to get your keys!

The other day however, he got a little upset and demanded to know what I was  doing. Without thinking my  first reply was,  “Stalking you.” … And thus the greatest game ever was born.

You have no idea what's about to happen!

I crept in closer and moved quietly, following him as he crossed in front of the bed. “You’re not doing a very good job, I’ve noticed you.” He told me,  but I was undeterred: “Of course you have, it’s just the two of us in here.”

... Would you notice me if we were in a crowded room...?

Aw crap, it's flashing yellow... time to blend...

Well, since he had spotted me, I ducked behind something as he went to the closet, bowing my head and pressing my hands together to blend, peeking ever so  often around the corner to check on him. A couple of times he looked at me and laughed, but that was only because he had yet to realize he was my  target.

... What's he doing by that closet...?

No, seriously, what's he doing?

Finally he kept his back turned long enough that I could make my move. Quickly and silently I darted across the room, flicking out my hidden blade and aiming for his throat, but at the last second he suddenly turned, driving a dagger into my upper thigh. How could I not have seen that he was an assassin as well?

Getting hit in the leg does hurt...

Especially with a knife.

 I lost my balance and fell into him, trying one last time to take out my target, thrusting my  hidden blade for his throat, but I had been exposed!

Yikes! And away!

Where's a bale of hay when you need one?

 I fled quickly and hid myself, waiting until surely my target had forgotten...

Boop!

Resynchronization and my wounds heal!

 At which point I strode back out…

... What's he doing...?

My sync bar senses something...

But now he was flinging throwing knives at me from across the room! One hit me in the stomach, the other my shoulder, while another grazed my leg. I was injured, but no vital spots had been hit, I would get him yet!

Markers can hurt.

In reality I would've bled to death later...

As I lunged for him he grabbed a sword and swung it,  but I blocked it with my hidden blade, then grabbed the sword and pushed it away, pulling out my own short blade with which to do battle. But then he pulled out a small knife and we paused the game for a moment because I didn’t wanna hurt him or get hurt with real weapons, so he traded the blade for nun chucks made of Wii remotes.

He dropped those quickly however and went for the door, grabbing up a book. I followed him though and shanked him quickly… but he was civilian, worse, a holy man! How had this happened?

I'm changing the rules mid-game!

...

So I stalked him a bit and decided he needed to be interrogated…

I can't shank you, but I can punch you!

TELL ME WHAT YOU KNOW!

Happiness Forever

On the way home from watching the Terror and the Spawn today, a day so awful I'm reluctant to even begin making pictures of the chaos for a blog post, I saw something magical...

I saw a shooting star...

 I closed my eyes and wished the first wish I could wish for: I wished the Hedgehog and I could be together and happy forever.

When the father of the Spawn and Terror dropped me off in the parking lot, it was to see that Hedgehog was only just leaving for work. He was running a little late. This never happens. I never get to see him right as he's leaving when I've been watching the Terror, and he's rarely if ever late. We talked a bit and he told me we had internet again, he'd paid it for the month, and I let off a bit of steam about the day, and I promised to meet him at work like I hadn't done in forever, and I went inside.

This is something like what the apartment looked like when I left this morning:

Only worse.

And this is what I came home to:

Gods above, he must've been bored out of his mind to do this!

... After my day... this was amazing... I also felt the usual horror of being so bad at being an adult he had to be one for me, but dear gods above, he cleaned the whole thing!

I Have Abandonment Issues

Right now I'm sitting in the bathroom of my apartment, wrapped up like a burrito in a blanket to preserve what little warmth I have left, shivering in front of my laptop, writing this post simply because I have nothing better to do and there's no way I can sleep tonight.

I'm in the bathroom because it's the best place to get internet access in the apartment, I'm a burrito because it's cold as ice in here, it's cold in here because the window is cracked so the wi-fi cord can be dangled out of it to get better internet. I'm doing this instead of sleeping because I can't sleep at night when the Hedgehog is away from home.

I should be used to it, he leaves once a month for drills because he's in the military, so I for nearly six months I've spent a weekend alone every month, yet every time I find that the apartment is suddenly strange and I can't sleep. I turn on all the lights and normally just sit on the bed, watching television or reading until the sun goes up and I can at last curl up into a ball and sleep in the safety of the morning sunlight.

Well, tonight he's staying over at his mom's 'cause he's hanging out with his little sister tomorrow.

Logically I know that there's nothing wrong with that, but I can't help but feel... abandoned. It's a feeling I can't put a name to, really. I don't know where it's coming from, or why I'm feeling it, but... I'm lonely and alone and I can't help but to remember... Awful things.

I remember being little and having my aunt tell me no one would love me, that they couldn't stand to be around me, that they would do anything they could to get away from me. In a weird way my dad confirmed it. All the times I ran away and he knew where I was but never came to tell me to come back home, because "it wouldn't change your mind". Yeah, well, that's not the point, dad, the point is that you care enough to try... They're horrible memories, and I feel awful remembering them, imparting their sadness to other people, but...

I sit here in the bathroom,  wrapped up as a burrito, lonely, feeling, for inexplicable reasons, abandoned and unwanted... How can I feel this way over nothing? He's just hanging with his sister, I know that, and I hate feeling like I'm being clingy, 'cause I'm scared of pushing him away. It's just so silly! Knowing that sometime tomorrow my Hedgehog will come home to me and I was feeling this way for nothing. I was just being stupid and petty and selfish.

On the bright side, at least I have a blog now to keep me busy.

The Awesome Apartment of Hedgehog and Kit!

Me and the Hedgehog live in a hospital!

Most awesome building ever.

No, seriously, we do. See, our apartment building used to be an old hospital, it was converted a long time ago to house people. Of course, if you look close enough, through the dingy gray carpet floors and the fake wood panel walls, you can still see the shapes of the old hospital rooms… It’s not so bad really, despite the fact my friend the Blonde One said it looks like something out of a Saw movie (then again, we don't often consider the Blonde one to be much of an authority on things other than web design...). I mean, it’s not like me and the Hedgehog are the ones living in the apartment that used to be the morgue. That was his aunt before she moved out!

Our apartment is a studio, which means that aside from the bathroom there’s no real escape from each other. So you can imagine that when we’re mad there’s no real place to go in order to cool down… which is why as of late we’ve been hanging out in the bathroom.

No, seriously.

It’s brightly lit in there, unlike the main room, and since it used to be a hospital bathroom it’s fairly large, large enough to set up a chair and a desk for the computer. We keep the window cracked and dangle the wi-fi adaptor we got from a cell-phone company out of it, so we get a full signal… Yeah, feel free to think of us as crazy. I certainly do.

"Hey, can you pass the toothpaste?"

Another interesting fact about the bathroom is that when the Hedgehog is in here late at night he claims to hear a woman talking to him. He always yells to see if it was me, but normally I’m either curled up asleep or I’m reading a book, so obviously it wasn’t me… There’s also a tile missing right in front of the bathroom door. I kinda freak myself out when the Hedgehog is gone for his military stuff by imagining scary things in there… Those nights I don’t sleep and leave the lights on all night, and even then I only sleep when the sun is up and the kitchen light is on.

We have a kitchen with the tiniest sink imaginable, which makes three dishes look like we haven’t washed them in a week. Also  in the kitchen we have this super moldy tile that’s quite terrifying. I never look up…

Only it's more colors than this.

It’s scary up there.

Oh, and above our bed there’s a square cut out of the tile. It was there when we moved in, the Hedgehog’s little sister made a really funny statement about how a hand would come down out of the hole at night and we would have to feed it…

I hunger for tacos!

Yeah, it freaked me out the first week we lived here. Now, not so much, but only because we like to imagine that Ceiling Cat lives up there.

Recently we got some glow-in-the dark stars and stuck them all over the ceiling, so now when the lights are out it’s all glowy and I imagine Ceiling Cat is peeping down at us from outer space.

Ceiling Cat loves you!

It makes me sleep like a baby…

No, really. This was the argument.

Our neighbors are kind of crazy… The first night after we moved in I heard the neighbors arguing… it was weird…

Those guys, the guys to the left of the apartment, used to argue constantly until the baby was born… at least,  I hope the baby was born…  I saw her in the hallway one day and she was pregnant, and a couple months later we’ve heard a baby crying in that apartment…

They aren’t the only  neighbors who fight,  though.  In fact, just last might, right after I got home from watching the Terror, the guys to our right and across the hall started screaming horribly. Then I heard glass shattering. When I went out later, the hallway was a mess…

There was a crib in front of a door and a bag of garbage had been emptied in the hall, and some clothing, men, women’s and children’s, was all mixed up with broken egg shells and a shattered fish bowl with the fish bowl stuff all strewn everywhere… shattered glass and bottles and rocks… A real mess…

Oh, hey! They’re arguing again! You know what this means? I'll have to talk to the police later.
Edit: And I did!

Oh, and a few months back we heard similar arguing and the sound of shattered glass and one of the window pane’s  for the stairwell was missing at there was blood splattered on the window and floor…

And the kids in this building love to bug us…

I swear they stand around waiting for the door to open...

They also like to call the Hedgehog my husband when talking about him.

This is a thought which terrifies me...

Oh! And sometimes at 2 am they like the play basketball!

Yeah, we see you out there, kids...

And I’ve seen two people get arrested here! The first guy waved a gun at the police! Yeah… home sweet home…

Morning After Edit: So, yeah. We ended up laying awake until 3am while they yelled and carried on in the hallway, by the way, this was after I'd already had to talk to the police because of the trouble they were causing. Eventually the landlord showed up, screamed at everyone, and made them clean up their mess; but until that happened, Hedgehog sat up playing DS and making “banjo noises”.

Why is he so cute and childish?